I have returned! I'm still alive and healthy but barely keeping my breath from combatting the stress and low-moods and finding the motivation to continue living a more productive life. Over the past several months, I've been through some emotional rollercoasters and tough periods where I'd want to jump off a cliff, but there was something that was quite life-changing that made me open my eyes a bit more.

In the recent weeks, I was told I only had 3 months left in the UK. Because in three months I am moving to America to live with my dad. Slightly scary. For me anyway because I've never had much major changes in my life (although I did immigrate from the Philippines, but I was two so I wouldn't really count that).

Because of my introverted ways and hermit-like lifestyle, I've stayed bottled up in my own room, watching the world from a screen rather than experience it. And with approximately 10 weeks left of my time here, the world around me seemed inevitable than ever, even though I never saw my town as interesting because I've lived here and seen pretty much everything here my entire life. This became my eye opener, my motivator that pushed me to make the most of my remaining time here.

From now on, I'll finish and then follow my Before I leave Bucket-list, which will include such things as writing my first novella, skinny dipping, starting my own zine, becoming semi-fluent in french, etc. I will also [try] to share it on here, so you can follow me on my journey of living a fuller life and towards becoming a person I want to be; a more confident and socially-savvy force to be reckoned with.

Always,

As part of the collaboration post with Leila, I did a portrait of her in a style that I mentioned I was practicing. As promised, I have made a post explaining this new style. I got the inspiration from a cool illustrator on Instagram - since I have a vague interest in fashion illustration, I was instantly attracted to it and I thought I would try it out myself :)

I've been practicing and experimenting on different techniques and mediums - watercolours as well as ProMarkers and gel ink. To sketch my outline, I followed a technique done by an artist on YouTube whereby the pencil is held almost horizontal, as if you're shading, and held like a paintbrush.

I did not really use guidelines because I don't really need them - since I am more of a portrait artist, I suppose, and have been doing portraits for a long time, I am already familiar with the anatomy and structure of a human.

First off, I did a rough sketch of my reference (Emily Lind photographed by Tyler Shields). I coloured her features in using watercolours, adding different hues to create an atmosphere and make it slightly surrealistic. Then, with my Muji black gel pen, I outlined her features to make it crisp - like an illustration.

This piece was actually my first attempt at the style :P

I practiced sketching quickly in this style using only a pen.

I always contemplate my life and I wonder about my future, thinking about where I'm going and planning how to get there. Some of you are perhaps thinking it's too early since I'm only 16 and I only have a few years left of my teenage years which I could make the most out of by going out and doing what other teens do these days.

To celebrate our last moments together before going off to our different pathways, us Year 11's attended the annual Prom! Everyone looked extravagant in their fancy suits and beautiful dresses and gowns and we had the most amazing time in our life so far! Good food, good music and making good memories! I loved every moment of it.

Since it's prom and I wanted to look good (who wouldn't?), I decided to go full glam and got my hair and nails done professionally! Of course, I did my own makeup - I already spent a lot of money on the hair, nails and dress (£130!). The look I was going for is modern 1960s Hollywood glam - my makeup was a cut crease with a bold winged liner and red lips; I went for long, round and light pink nails to accentuate the daintiness of my fingers; soft curls swept back at one side; a two-piece black and red Sherri Hill dress with blue and gold platform heels (which you really can't see) and a red Nina West purse!

1960s glam meets Whitney Houston glam!

Photo with squad. They all looked lovely!

Best friend and I - it's our last time together before she moves to the U.S!

UPDATE

2003 - 2016

In 2012, I created a blog that centred around Brandy - documenting his time with us through photos and videos and expressing our love for him. If you'd like, you can check it out here.

Hey!